Names have been changed to protect the innocent!
Q1: we have a free block of time this evening, who can make it to a work session tonight?
Useless answer 1: I didn’t know we were meeting tonight! I’m in Moscow all week!
We knew that! Please don’t tell us what you would have done!
Q2: I’m looking for CDs any suggestions?
UA2: if I would have known I would have brought bunch yesterday!
Please don’t communicate to people in the past it is a way of admonishing people about their actions without being direct. I it’s kind of like saying
“Why weren’t you thinking about me before you knew what you wanted!?”
If you want people to think of you as being useful you have to be able to go out and make sure that they are getting what they want and now what you would have given them if you would have been informed before!
If you have a sense of insecurity that needs people to think of you, please do not tell me what you would have done. Tell me what you are going to do now!
My needs and those of your clients exist in the future not even in the present! You have to be able to tell them how and when you will be able to meet their needs. So don’t show them what you would have done or even what they should have done. Show them the answer lead them towards the light.
The past is the past.
Stop talking about it!